while preparing to launch my screenplay Rain Dogs out onto an unsuspecting and (it must be said) largely indifferent world, I came across this piece of advice to wannabe screenwriters:
“Always go after IP before starting in on an original idea. Buyers have told me multiple times they won’t look at anything not based on IP.”
hmmm, I thought, this could be a bit problematic
no, not because Rain Dogs is not based on IP – i’ve made my peace with that uncomfortable fact a long time ago
the reason i find the advice problematic, is because it pisses me off
now normally when something pisses me off, particularly when it relates to The Day Job or The World Today, i just try to ignore it … sure, maybe i have a bit of rant with my colleagues, family and/or friends … but then i move on – i mean, life’s too short, right?
but now?
well, in my inaugural blog post, i wrote that i would: try to be as open as possible – i know, i know, but it seemed harmless enough at the time – but now … well, now i have to SAY SOMETHING
why? because this isn’t just about “work”, it’s about “my work” – and so, if i’m gonna try to be open, then i should let you, dear PP (Potential Partner), know what i think of The Advice
however, before we get into that, i should clarify a few things
1 – i am not in the industry and so am naive, ignorant and probably wrong about everything … including The Advice (however, being wrong about something doesn’t mean you can’t be angry about it – see [insert name of current bunch of nutters who are doing your head in])
2 – i assume the giver of The Advice knows what they are talking about, and sincerely and honestly believe that The Advice is both accurate and useful
3 – i’m not anti-IP – some (a lot!) of my favourite movies and shows are based on a third party’s IP – and i admit, i’ve even thought of adapting some IP myself – if and when, A: i come across something i really love, and B: i can afford it
4 – my understanding is that IP does not include stuff like, The Willows by Algernon Blackwood – why? – well it’s public domain and, more importantly, no one knows who the fuck Blackwood is ... i mean, it’s not like he’s an Austen or a Dickens
5 – and finally – i see “commonalities” between the current fixation on existing IP and the many, far more important issues faced by society today – and so they become conflated in my head – and the frustration and anger i feel re (say) the lack of action on global warming, bleeds out and stains my reaction to The Advice … so apologies if things get a little sarcastic~
the IP stamp of acceptability
look, i’m just as lazy and insecure as the next bloke, so i get the appeal of IP – no, really
the IP stamp of acceptability is a valuable endorsement – after all, it tells you that someone somewhere once paid some money for some previous rendition of the story [1]
i mean, COME ON! – how good is that?! – it practically guarantees that some other someones may be willing to PAY for another rendering of the same thing – WOW! – you can imagine how much easier it makes things for a Producer when they go looking for money:
THE MONEY: is this material any good?
PRODUCER: yes, someone once paid money for it
THE MONEY: is there an audience for it?
PRODUCER: of course, i mean, someone did pay money for it
THE MONEY: is the material suitable for the screen?
PRODUCER: i guess ... did i mention that someone paid money for it?
THE MONEY: yes, yes you did, you make a compelling argument
BOOYAH! – works every single fucking time! – the IP stamp of acceptability makes selling screenplays easy! – now you understand how AMAZING the IP stamp of acceptability is, right? – you’d have to be nuts to waste your time on something “original”
but, but, but ...
okay ... I know this new IP-first world is hard to get your head around, so i’ve constructed a little Q&A with film industry executive, D. D. Strawmann
Q: what about the advice that says, “write what you’re passionate about”?
A: um, well I guess it still stands … just with the added caveat that it must now be based on existing IP
Q: but what if i can’t find an (affordable) piece of IP that i’m “passionate about”?
A: not really The Money’s issue … but perhaps you’re being too picky
Q: but without access to IP, how will i (a wannabe screenwriter) be able to develop my craft?
A: once again, not really The Money’s issue – there are literally millions of wannabe screenwriters with their wannabe scripts – do you have any idea how exhausting that is? – culling a few from the herd with the IP stamp of acceptability makes their life just that little bit easier … don’t take it personally, it’s just business
Q: but surely audiences will get tired of seeing the same thing over and over again
A: audiences say they get tired and bored, and yet they keep showing up – proving two things – one, that they are liars, and – two, that they really do want more of the same
Q: but how do you know? i mean, where is the research? what are the stats?
A: okay, that’s three questions – and you’re starting to sound a bit defensive – EVERYONE knows buyers prefer IP-endorsed content because EVERYONE knows that’s what audiences prefer – I mean, EVERYONE is saying it!
Q: just because “everyone” is saying it, doesn’t make it true – what about those “everyones” who once said that a superhero movie with a woman in the lead wouldn’t be profitable – or those other “everyones” who said that a movie made with a cast of people predominately of African-heritage wouldn’t sell? – couldn’t this be the same kind of thing?
A: are you calling buyers a bunch of misogynist racists?!
Q: no! – what I mean is, couldn’t this piece of “accepted wisdom” be as wrong as the examples used above?
A: but this has nothing to do with gender or race
Q: well, yeah, it kind of does – if you’re green-lighting stuff based on preexisting IP, then the chances that it features a white, hetro male as the protagonist would be quite high, wouldn’t it?
A: the two examples you just gave – Wonder Woman and Black Panther – they were based on pre-existing IP, right?
Q: sure, i guess, but they’re just two ... never mind – for the sake of argument, let’s say that buyers (for whatever reason) DO prefer IP-endorsed material – but how do we know that audiences prefer IP-endorsed material too?
A: we’ve already covered this: audiences are watching IP-endorsed material
Q: but that may only be because there’s SO MUCH IP-endorsed material out there – you’re flooding the audience’s range of options with IP-endorsed material and then claiming that the choices they make from within your skewed sample somehow proves your point
A: so you agree, audiences DO prefer watching IP-endorsed material
Q: only because there’s so much of it – a lot of the time they don’t even realise it’s based on existing IP – they’re just watching––
A: so you agree
Q: fine – whatever – but aren’t you worried that if we stop generating new IP, we’ll eventually run out of IP-endorsed material in the future?
A: the future? we’re talking about NOW
Q: but things are changing so fast, how can you predict what people will want?
A: we don’t have to predict, we know – audiences will want IP-endorsed material
Q: but surely an industry so reliant on creativity needs to invest in developing and nurturing a broad range of new ideas and––?
A: of course! – that’s why we have a shit-ton of new IP-endorsed material in development as we speak!
Q: ––new ideas AND the the talent to develop it – what is the industry telling screenwriters when they say that they are no longer interested in new ideas? – aren’t you worried about a talent exodus? – that writers will leave the business to pursue more fulfilling and interesting work?
A: i doubt that will happen – even screenwriters have to eat occasionally
Q: so you have no concerns about the future?
A: the future?! – shit! – why worry about something that may never happen!
[1] story or material with potential, narrative-friendly elements