fruit boot soles
AN OUTDATED LEXICON
back in the 1970s, my parents ^encouraged^ me to join a youth group [1] – i’m not sure why – however i suspect they soon realised that whatever hopes they may have harboured as to its potential positive influences, were almost entirely misplaced … although it did deepen my love of the Australian wilderness
ironically, the organisation of which the group was a part, had nothing to with bushwalking or other scout-like activities – however, despite this, it became the focus of most of our activities … well, after the organisation’s primary focus: marching – the kids in our group had a love/hate relationship with marching – we hated it, because it was pointless and boring – and we loved it, because our group was the best at it, at both state and national levels
typical of people who share in certain niche practices, the kids in the youth group developed a list of ingroup terms and expressions centred around the activities we shared in – and as they were invented by teenage boys in the 1970s, some of these have not aged well
that said, i still find many of these terms amusing, or at least nostalgia inducing for a time when creating terms like “doing a Pigpen” was a necessity
WARNING: PROBLEMATIC LANGUAGE AHEAD
adjitate: to do administrative work – to perform the duties of an adjutant
apple boot: a banana boot on which the tread of the soles are inset from the edge of the boot
arrive: used in place of the word ‘come’, to avoid childish jokes punning on the word ‘cum’
a voice in the wilderness: someone in authority who is unwilling to use it, for fear of push back or, you know, actually doing their job
Bazzared it: to ruin a joke by mistelling it
Bazza shuffle: a slow, painful shuffle
B.C.: big cunt – can denote either a person’s (or animal’s) size and/or character
blister boots: lightweight, canvas boots – supposedly designed for soldiers in the tropics
BLooDy March: Ballarat Long Distance March – once a regular event that was held in Ballarat each Easter
braised C and C: braised crap and crap – canned braised steak and onions – no doubt the word ‘steak’ was used because, “tough, stringy beef and gristle” wouldn’t fit on the can
bread box: pre-1970 Land Rover of bold rectangular design – similar in shape to the tins used to protect bread from mice
brew: tea
brothel creepers: sneakers, sandshoes, runners, trainers etc
bruce: an ignorant person
bullet: Bleut S 200, a stove using disposable gas cylinders
bum wiper: in marching, someone who moves their arms wide while swinging them forward, but then swings them behind their body when swinging them back
BYAK: Backyard Abortion Kit – a large, well-appointed first aid kit
cadet: originally cadette – a small cad – one who does not behave as a gentleman should
cigar bottle: a Sig bottle, an aluminium bottle capable of being pressurised and used to store flammable liquids such as Shellite (naphtha)
catamatic dishwasher: a feral cat that cleans dishes when they are left out overnight
cattle train: a country train with its interior divided into dog boxes
cement pond: swimming pool (from The Beverley Hillbillies)
chuffa or chooffa: Optimus 8R Shellite stove – named after the noise it makes
circus tent: a large, three-man hiking tent
C.C.: conscientious objector – someone who constantly claims to be unable to participate in certain activities due to extenuating circumstances
Crotch Mountain: Box Hill – location of a rival group
cunning stunt: an attractive woman
cunny funt: a smart arse – a comedian
cup o’ tea and a bum: a tea break – a rest stop
Curlie’s mate: any large, aggressive bull ant
Dad: group leader
dear: a fellow group member
D.C.: dumb cunt – a stupid person
D.H.: dick head – a stupid or irresponsible person
dig a hole: in bushwalking, to go out and relieve oneself of one’s faeces
do an Eccles: to be saved by a miracle – to be prevented from rolling off a cliff by a small bush
do a Pigpen: to compound poor planning with bad luck – to look into a billy (a large can used for cooking) at the moment the SSP it contains explodes
do a Simmo: to head butt a cricket ball
do a Yosty: to be blind to reality while focussing on the theoretical – to become geographically embarrassed while contemplating a problem in pure mathematics
dog box: in a country train, an eight seat apartment
flake: general term for any fish, both living animals and food
flavour change: tomato sauce (ketchup)
four-lane highway: in bushwalking, a four-wheel drive track
Fred roll: to roll on the ground yelling in pain, due to having scalding water spilled on one’s thighs
fruit boots: banana boots, or other boots, where the tread extends to the edge of the sole
G.F.C.: great fucking cunt
geographically embarrassed: lost, astray, unsure of one’s location
Greek flag: garish clothing
Greasy Joe’s: any non-franchised fish-and-chip or burger shop
gumbidgee: a mischievous bush spirit upon who all bushwalking mishaps are blamed
hang it on: see ‘hang shit on’
hang shit on: to ridicule or tease someone
hang up boots: to give up bushwalking
howsa your face: greeting and/or a challenge
I can’t: often purposely misinterpreted as, “I cunt” – to which the standard response is, “Yes you are”
it’s okay, it’s alright: disgruntled agreement to do what was asked
Jungle hop: to vigorously hop on one leg while swearing, after accidentally hacking into one’s shin with a machete
keep it for posterity: retain an item in the hope of returning it to a lapsed member
khaked it: died, ceased functioning
knee slapper: an anecdote told with comedic intent by a superior, that requires a suitable show of amusement from their underlings
library: pornographic collection
Lightning Ridge: the Cathedral Ranges near Buxton, where a group of young bushwalkers and their leaders were struck by lightning in the early 1970s
Ling roll: a less than perfect gymnastic tumble that, while of dubious value in winning competitions, was ideal for flattening large tents before packing
MacNamara’s Mum: an over-protective parent
manures: manoeuvres
medic: in bushwalking, a request for a rest stop or for medical attention
Moroka dike roll: a damp but salvageable toilet roll
N.F.I.: no fucking idea
nice one centurion: a compliment – can also be used sarcastically (from The Life of Brian)
night manures: night manoeuvres
no wucking furries: no worries
not the messiah: a very naughty boy (from The Life of Brian)
ordinary: used as a substitute for a swear word
orgasm: organism
orgynise: to organise – often involves a lot of fucking around
orifice: a small, dingy office
orificer: an unfriendly or unhelpful officer – literally an arsehole of an officer
orsomething: generic term for powdered fruit drinks
Phil the Greek Award: the Duke of Edinburgh Award
pro: Public Relations Officer
quiet street: an ideal camp site – a camp site away from other campers
rank: very, extremely
reccy: an unofficial road trip to reconnoitre locations for future activities
rectum: ruined, near death
rocket: new (at the time), super-efficient portable stove that taps directly into the Sig bottle – named after the noise it makes
S.A.: short arse – a person of small stature
scrounging: in bushwalking, begging food from other campers
seat belt: waist or hip belt on a back pack
second biggest (noun) I’ve ever seen: a very large item (from Get Smart)
semen: Sui-min – instant noodle meal sold in polystyrene cup
siphilisation: derogatory term for civilisation
snafu: situation normal, all fucked up
spaghetti: in bushwalking, various articles attached and hanging off the outside of a pack
S.S.P.: a self saucing pudding in a tin – prepared by making a small puncture in the lid and setting placing the tin in boiling water – failure to puncture the lid and/or ensure there’s enough water can result in “doing a Pigpen”
stickon: a tiny grey bird that perches on the trunks of trees – note: the bird is only referred to as a “stickon” while perching, in flight it is just a bird
taxi: exclamation to indicate that the proposed cost is too high
ten second tent: to cook in a two-man tent and so risk burning it down in ten seconds
thump therapy: to correct someone by punching them
Toorak tractor: a large, expensive four-wheel drive that is never taken off road
toothy pegs: teeth
torso: penis
tourist: derogatory term applied to non-hikers in general, and to those whose crass behaviour merit it
troops: cadets
two dogs: an ignorant person
vaginal cream: a lotion used to treat extreme cases of sunburn
wench: winch
wood eye: would I – an exclamation in the affirmative
wog chair: a collapsible stool
you can’t: often purposely misinterpreted as, “you cunt” – to which the standard response is, “No, I’m not”
[1] the organisation shall remain nameless